I'm taking a little bit of a break to collect my thoughts, due to the shock of what has happened....I'm having a hard time processing it. Things....have changed. My friend who was going to be my roommate has been acting like someone completely different the past week or so, not the caring guy I met and known the past 8 years like a brother.
There has been irresponsibility and lack of consideration, regardless of my loyalty and dedication. That's all I'll say about it. Good business partner, but that's what we'll stay. I have been emotionally shaken too many times this week because of it. I will not be moving to Florida.
The Shifting Plates
It really breaks me to say that, because I have had no ideas of what to do with my life. I'll still work on the game, but I am about to lose my main job, due to planning for Florida and agreed on a final work day due to withdrawing to Florida, which has now changed. I've been working Lyft every day just to put food on my table, and gas. It's been very hard.
Florida, game design, all that was my last real idea, what I considered my "last hope", potentially. I don't know what to do with my life anymore, I feel lost, like I'm at a dead end. I really want to write stories, get them out in games, animations, the works. That's where my heart is. I love making music too though.
Where I live.
Louisville has lack of opportunities for someone like me, it's hard here, and you end up with greasy, horrible, condescending managers who make you wonder why they put these highschool bullies in charge, instead of real team leaders. I will NEVER work for someone like that again. It's only extreme stress, regret, lack of self-respect, and depression. Never slave your health over people who don't value you, easily replace you, and don't care if you drop dead on-site.
But, I Would've Missed People.
This town has lots of horrible, crazy drivers, miserable people, but amongst the chaos, I've met some really kind souls, like my co-workers. I love them, they're my family. I would have missed them, and my family. There's more cons than pros in this city, don't get me wrong, it's turning into something much worse due to the recent changes in the city, LOTS of BS here, but it has it's nice things. I don't like most of the people, though, city's got too many people.
Where to Go From Here?
I don't know what to do, I'm lost, but I need an opportunity, I'm looking for jobs, but I don't know what to do, what I'd be good at. Someone suggested copy-writing but i think you need classes for that yeah? I don't know, I kind of wish I could be like Jim Varney and pull an Ernest, be an advertising mascot guy some character that advertises for people with puns and crazy voices. He and Robin Williams inspired me greatly growing up in that regard, it's why I voice act, and act in general.
But where to go from here? Other than keep making music, I don't know. I'll keep working with my business partner unless he drops me, then I'll have to make Venturescape on my own, but I need a main source of income. I've tried following my dreams, it's really hard...I'm trying to figure out what to do because of lack of money and my mom is moving to Michigan to live with her fiance...
So...I'm open to any suggestions, any miracle opportunities that will save me. Help? I'm taking a small break to collect my thoughts while I look for a new job....I guess. I wish I could only know what I did to deserve all this....this had potential to be a great thing, if he would have let it. This is why I am hesitant to get close to people.
So, About That Music...
Due to the stressful week, and dramatic change of plans, music will be on hold until I figure out what I'm going to do for a job and financial stuff, unless by some miracle more people buy my latest single on BandCamp to keep me afloat, or donate to my Ko-fi.
I was really looking forward to all this....sorry guys. The Other Side Chronicles will not be coming out June 8th, it takes a decent chunk of money to put it on Itunes, and I don't even have everything done due to the ways things have turned out because of someone's lack of consideration and causing things to be difficult when they should have been simple, I wasn't asking much.
I'd like to think the album would come out in August at this point, or sooner, but I have no idea when things will get better. I have to emotionally heal from this, so it will be a bit of time before I can work on music again. Maybe a week or so. I need all the support and comfort I can get right now. Sorry guys, love you all.